The Sirens Song

We all experience them.  They're impossible to ignore.  One little thing sets them off into a choral concert of their life down d-hall. I am talking about the choir kids.  The distinct breed who is loved by each other and hated by everyone else.  These spawns of satan can be recognized by a couple things, their volume, clothes, and manner.  They dress exactly how they are, indie artist wanna-bee's.  The tight neon orange pants, '8o's rock band tee's, drapped with a choir jacket, and nike 6.0's.  These hyper-active pricks think they are true blue indie artists struggling to make it.  Like they're on the same level as the blazed up artists of broad Ripple who are living in their cars and feeding on Ramen Noodles, they're not.  They go to a public high school and they're "grass roots" start with a teacher by the last name of Wiehe.  Their clothes were made in the same Vietnamese sweatshop by the starving five year old, just like every other kid at N.C.  Wow, very deep.  The choir kids volume is another distinct indicator that they are in fact, choir kids.  These kids sing every moment of the day, you can hear them wherever you are, and anything sets them off.  They see a homeless man on the street and out they belt "The Scientist" by Coldplay.  They need to make a beer run, it's "Beat it" by Michael Jackson.  They eat a Gummy Bear DON'T STOP BELIEVIN'!! the worst part is they feel that the original artists didn't do a good enough rendition of their song for you so they have to re-do it and make it better.  they are self-absorbed choir nuts.  They talk about choir everyday, all day.  If you are with a group of choir kids and you're not one yourself, please bring a fire extinguisher for yourself because if you catch on fire you're on your own.  they'll be too busy singing and dancing and gloating about themselves to help you.  Choir kids have been around since high school choir has been around.  They're not going away. They have a pinch of talent and suddenly their ego is bigger than Oprah at thanksgiving dinner.  The best thing to think when a choir kid is in full choral action is they will make it to hollywood, waiter positions are opening everyday.